Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Diabetes visibility

I do not hide the fact that I have diabetes. Yes I did deny it for MANY years, but I do not hide it.

I will not meet a person and say "Hello, I am a person with diabetes". You have to meet me first.....meet who I am, what I am about....and along that journey my pump will fall into visual sight, or I will check my blood sugar, treat a low, twirl my tubing with my fingers....and that generally is the sign that I am ok to let you know.

I am not ashamed of having diabetes....why would I be? It was not my choice 23 years ago, and it was not my fault.....but for some reason I want people to meet me first, before they meet my diabetes.

BUT, ever since my life's journey included my amazing insulin pump, I find my diabetes is less visible to the public eye, and less visible in my daily thoughts. I am more vocal about my diabetes, but in turn my diabetes has become less visible.

When I started using the continuous glucose sensor system, the visibility of my diabetes reduced even further, to the point that I realize the people closest to me in my life are rarely aware of my diabetes (except for when the good 'ol pump pops out to say hello!). I calibrate twice a day, and that is usually when I wake and when I go to sleep. I eat generally what I want when I want (thank you carb counting)....have random meal times, a sporadic lifestyle......

Is my life......wait for it........normal!? Could it be? All of these years hating the word normal, as I felt it defined my life into a feeling of being wrong. Of course I know my life now is not normal, I have a pump hanging on for dear life 24/7, but being a person with diabetes......the mere fact that people around me forget I have diabetes is an amazing feeling. They are not thinking of me in terms of my disease.

They are thinking of me as a person first.......oh yeah, and a touch of diabetes :)


Cara said...

Almost normal... I just can't wait for the day we can say, "I used to have diabetes!!!!" :)

Cara said...

Almost normal... I just can't wait for the day we can say, "I used to have diabetes!!!!" :)

Donna said...

Hi Drea,
Since I'm such an introvert, I've always tried to hide my diabetes. The pump has made that a lot easier for me. I think most people just think it's a cellphone case or something.

Normal is a pretty broad word in our diabetes world, isn't it. :)